Saturday, April 15, 2023

The Answer Is Nothing

Just one of those days weeks months years.
Panel 1, I’m at my computer, I say, “Okay, what do I want to work on today?”, Panel 2, I stare at the screen, Panel 3, I’m still staring at it, Panel 4, I’m laying my head down on the table looking defeated.
Maybe I wouldn’t be so stressed and unable to write if I had enough money to live off of, but unfortunately that’s not going to happen, ha ha, this world is a dystopian nightmare.

Thursday, April 13, 2023

Language Of Confusion: Maximum Carnage, Part V

Last part! Not quite as long as the last one, because there aren’t as many words that come from the Proto Indo European root sker-, to cut. Still a bunch, though.
 
First we’re going to look at scabbard, yes, the sheathe for a sword. It showed up in the fourteenth century as scauberc, which soon morphed into the -ard ending. It’s from the Anglo French escauberc, from the Proto Germanic sker-berg-, with the sker- part coming from skar, blade, which is from sker-. The berg part actually means protect, so a scabbard is a blade-protect. And for the record, scab is not related at all, in spite of it making sense that it would be descended from the same place.

 
Next is skirmish, which… I guess it can involve cutting. It showed up in the late fourteenth century as a noun and around that time for the verb—funny enough, before that, the verb was just to skirm. It’s actually from the Old French escarmouche, which got to us from the Proto Germanic skirmjanan, which is from sker-. The word scrimmage is actually from skirmish, being an alteration of it. Fairly sensible, right? Ha ha, keep reading. Screen showed up in the mid fourteenth century from the Old North French escren/Old French escran. That’s thought to be from (somehow) skirmjanan, a word that’s related to protection. A screen originally was something that “protected” from light. Sure, whatever.
 
Then there’s skirt. Yes, like you wear—and also like the back half of outskirt, as they’re from the same place. And that place is the word shirt. Shirt is from the Old English scyrte, while skirt is actually from the Old Norse skyrta, but both are from the Proto Germanic skurtjon, and they’re from sker-. I guess because you cut fabric, whether it be for the upper body or lower body? Still though.
 
Finally today, short, because things just aren’t weird enough. It’s from the Old English scort, which just means short, and before that the Proto Germanic skurta-, which is from sker-. I guess short things are something that’s been cut off. I feel vaguely offended at that.
 
Sources
Online Etymology Dictionary
Omniglot
University of Texas at Austin Linguistic Research Center
University of Texas at San Antonio’s page on Proto Indo European language
University of Texas at Arlington
Tony Jebson’s page on the Origins of Old English
Old English-English Dictionary
Fordham University

Tuesday, April 11, 2023

From The Spamfiles

Time for something a lot cheerier than the rest of life: spam.

Message from Job at Provide Insur. saying Welcome 5848, Wow!! Search for affordable insurance rates
5848? Who told you my real name?

Message from QNixWatch, saying this watch will alert you to any anomaly in your heart
A watch can do all that? Call the hospitals! We now have a fast, cheap tool for heat scans!

Message from PAYPAL (all caps, of course) telling me I need to confirm my receipt of one hundred dollars
Now I’m all bummed that someone really isn’t giving me a hundred dollars. Thanks a lot, spam.

Message from Mia Malkova, saying Mia has repliied to you with a SEXY meessage, peppered with a bunch of weird emojis
What’s with the extra vowels added to random words? I’d rather she answer that question.

Tumblr user mina-jzfreshwater49 is now following me, with a picture of a woman in a bikini against a jungle background
The spambots on Tumblr have evolved to using names and random words, but they’re still throwing in random numbers and letters as if that’s not the biggest red flag for ANY social media site. This is really low-effort for them. Try harder!

Saturday, April 8, 2023

The Howling

Real or not, this is the first time in my life I’ve ever been woken up by howling.
Panel 1, I’m asleep in bed, and a sharp “A-A-A!” noise starts, Panel 2, I wake up as an “A-woo! A-a-a-woo!” fills the room, Panel 3, I’m looking alarmed, and now there’s barking and “A-woo!” Panel 4, howling continues, and I say, “I find it concerning that I can’t tell if this is real or if I’m dreaming.”
I haven’t been able to find anyone else who heard it (I know one neighbor has dogs but I barely ever see this neighbor, and the dogs have never done this before), so I’m not one hundred percent sure this wasn’t some fragment of a dream—even when I woke up I wasn’t sure. Regardless, it was a weird experience I just had to share.

Thursday, April 6, 2023

Language Of Confusion: Maximum Carnage, Part IV

We’ve got a bunch more of these to look at! All are descended from the Proto Indo European root sker-to cut. Though it may not seem like it at times.
 
First we’re going to look at shard—all the words this week start with sh, I guess they got rid of the K sound. It comes from the Old English sceard, which means chipped or broken, much like a shard is. That’s from the Proto Germanic skardaz, which is from sker-. A surprisingly sensible origin. Shards are a cut piece of something!
 
Sharp comes from the Old English scearp, which just means sharp, big surprise. It’s from the Proto Germanic skarpaz, meaning it was the same word as sharp’s origin, but still with a P in place of the D. And that of course is from sker-, so we still aren’t making any huge leaps here.
 
Then there’s share, which… yeah, really. Share. It comes from the Middle English share and Old English scaeru, a division, then before that the Proto Germanic skeraz, and that’s from sker-. A share is a cut of something. I can’t believe this makes sense.
 
Shore showed up in the fourteenth century. It’s got a few possible origins, like the Old English scora/sceor-, which was part of place names, the Middle Low German schor, shore or coast, and the Middle Dutch scorre, land washed by sea. All are thought to be from the Proto Germanic skur-o-, cut, which is from sker-, though I don’t see the leap from cut to washed by the sea. Still, this is etymology, and you know how backwards it can be.
 
Nex, shear, like you shear sheep, so I can pretty much guess how this will go (spoiler: like all of the above words). It’s from the Middle English sheren, from the Old English scieran, to cut. That’s from the Proto Germanic skero-, to cut, from sker-. Yep, that’s what I thought.
 
But there’s also sheer, which has more varied meanings—thin (the mid sixteenth century), absolute or utter (the late sixteenth century), steep like a cliff (nineteenth century). And before all that, it showed up in the thirteenth century meaning free from guilt—the day before Good Friday, as in today, is actually called, not kidding, Sheer Thursday!!! Why such varied meanings? It’s a bit complicated, but sheer was scir in Old English and meant bright, pure, or translucent—so thin and absolute make sense, though steep not so much. Anyway, it’s from the Proto Germanic skeran, which is from sker-. This was definitely the weirdest one.
 
Happy Sheer Thursday, everyone.
 
Sources
Online Etymology Dictionary
University of Texas at Austin Linguistic Research Center
University of Texas at San Antonio’s page on Proto Indo European language
University of Texas at Arlington
Tony Jebson’s page on the Origins of Old English
Old English-English Dictionary
In Depth Germanic Language Studies
History Of The Dutch Language

Tuesday, April 4, 2023

April Goals

Oh frig. March is done already? But it sucked!!!
 
March Goals
1. Actually edit the web serial this time.
Hey, I actually started this! It’s a miracle.
 
2. Hopefully find some way to recharge. And maybe sleep!
Failed this one. I’m so tired. I’ve heard people say they wake up in the mornings no longer feeling tired but I think that might be a lie.
 
3. Keep searching for a way to get rid of those m*****f*****g rounded window corners in everything I try to use on my computer. Don’t get Windows 11. Stick with 10.
This one’s not my fault, but the fault of Microsoft, who created an operating system designed to inflict torture on people. One of the updates for it literally broke my computer. I had to roll it back, and now it keeps bugging me to download the computer-breaking update. I miss 10 so much. I took it for granted. It was the least awful of all operating systems.
 
So that was March. It was the worst. I doubt April’s going to be any better.
 
April Goals
1. Finish the web serial edits. Not sure I’ll be able to get there, but I should be able to get close.
 
2. Update my etymology page. You know what a treat this always is. Stupid Google.
 
3. Find some way to get my work out there more. Not that I have any idea how to do this…
 
Ugh, March. Ugh, April.
 
What do you want to do this month?

Saturday, April 1, 2023

Flavors

Why does EVERYTHING have to come in stupid flavors?
Panel 1, I’m walking along with a package of yogurt raisins, I say, “Mmm, yogurt raisins.” Panel 2, I eat some of the raisins, Panel 3, I make a disgusted face as I’m chewing, Panel 4, I look at the pack and say, “‘Peanut butter and jelly flavor’. They neglected to mention the secret ingredient of puke.”
I know it’s my own fault for picking up the wrong package in the store, but COME ON. Is it that impossible to make a flavor that doesn’t taste like it was scraped off the bottom of someone’s shoe?