Tuesday, December 6, 2016

December Goals

Well, it’s December. Just one month left of 2016 and then it’s gone and most importantly, it can’t come back.

So let’s see how I did on my November goals.

November Goals
1. Write 10,000 words for new story idea. I don’t know if I’ll get there, but I want to aim high. So when I inevitably fail I can wallow in that much more misery.
I…actually did this. I got ten thousand words. Even though I missed more than a week of writing.

2. Do a bunch of boring adult crap like raking the pine needles and stuff. I hate being an adult.
I did this too. Damn pine needles.

3. Oh god. Thanksgiving is this month. Please, no. Not that. Anything but that.
Hey, it wasn’t terrible! Considering how bad 2016 was, this is the most surprising thing of all.

Wow, successful month. You’d almost not believe the world was going to end.

Anyway, now for this month:

December Goals
1. Do 10,000 more words in the WIP. If I was able to do it last month, I better be able to do it now.

2. Maybe update my blog design. It’s been YEARS.

3. Christmas. AAAAAAAAAAGH.

Okay, so that’s the plan. Let’s see how much it can go awry! So what are you up to this month?

Saturday, December 3, 2016

The Last Place You Want To Look

Veronica, in her insistence on being with me at all times, will often lie on things that she’s not supposed to. Usually it’s my glasses.

Turns out that really loud purring drowns out the sound of a text coming in. Of course, it’s loud enough to drown out most things…

Thursday, December 1, 2016

Language of Confusion: Ports, Part IV

Fourth week now. Let’s hope we can actually finish it this time.

First, deport showed up in the late fifteenth century meaning…to behave. I can’t even wrap my head around that. The other deport, like you would a person, didn’t show up until the mid seventeenth century! And they actually have slightly different origins. That weird deport comes from the Old French deporter, which could mean behave or things like be patient, amuse, delay, treat kindly, and take sexual pleasure with. Seriously, what the hell. Like the other -port words it comes from the classical Latin portare, carry, and the de- prefix means from or off. No, that makes no sense. It makes less than no sense. The other deport—the one we still use—came to us from Modern French, where it was d├ęporter, carry off (or, you know, deport), and before that the classical Latin deportare, transport. Now I want to take the other deport and yell at it, “See?! This is how an etymology is supposed to go!!”

Ahem. Speaking of transport, it showed up in the late fourteenth century coming from the Old French transporter and classical Latin transportare, which is just transport. The trans- part means across, so it’s carry across. It’s nice to read something that doesn’t make me want to scramble my brains with an ice pick. Deport. PS., teleport didn’t show up until 1940 and is actually tele- (far off) plus transport. I’m assuming sci-fi has something to do with that.

Support showed up in the late fourteenth century from the Old French supporter and classical Latin (I’m sure you can guess it) supportare, or support. Support’s original definition was things like hold up or sustain, and it’s a mix of the prefix sub-, up from under, and portare, carry. So it’s to carry up from under, which makes sense. I think.

Finally today, we’re going to do some quick etymologies of the final port words. Passport is from the sixteenth century, coming from the Middle French passeport, authorization to pass through a port. It’s literally pass + the ship port. Next, purport showed up in the early fifteenth century from the Anglo French purport and Old French porport/purporter, contents, or convey. That’s a combination of pur-, which is basically por- or pro- and means forth, and porter, which of course comes from portare. Purport is to carry forth. Lastly there’s comport, which showed up in the late fourteenth century from the Old French comporter, endure or behave. It’s from the Latin comportare, which could mean things like transport or bring together. That last one makes sense since com- means together, so it’s carry together. Not that we use comport much these days…

TL;DR: If you ever want to etymologize the word port for your blog, it’s going to take way longer than you think.


Tuesday, November 29, 2016

We’re So Proud

Thanksgiving…wasn’t terrible? I guess it’s all being saved up for Christmas. Ugh, Christmas is coming.

But I did see my cousins, who are pretty cool. One of them showed me a sketch she did as a part of her project for her senior year of college, where she plays the "fun cop".

Her mother thought it was particularly hilarious, and makes up about a third of those views there. She might be a little biased, but I still really enjoyed it. Fun fact: every parent in the room said that better not be real coke, to which she reminded them she couldn’t afford it.

Saturday, November 26, 2016

Thanksgiving Spam 3

I’m sure I’m still exhausted from Thanksgiving. You know the drill.

Well, I can’t argue with the fact that my blog is quality writing.

Damn it, I don’t have a province. I was this close to getting five million dollars!

I really hope you’re doing something about your kid’s gym teacher being a pedophile because seriously, what the hell.

Thursday, November 24, 2016

Thanksgiving Spam 2

Today is Thanksgiving here and I still don’t feel like working! So spam.

That must have been one hell of a background check because I didn’t know I had a daughter.

Not really sure what this one is trying to say. I’d really like to know what “proper drainage” means in regards to blogging.

I’d kind of like to know why and how this person knows that brain washing is faster.

Tuesday, November 22, 2016

Thanksgiving Spam 1

It’s Thanksgiving week in the US and I don’t feel like working! So here’s some spam, from way back when I first started the Spamfiles!

One of my very first posts! The answer to this query is still “By conning people into thinking they can make $94,218 blogging”.

Uh-oh, you guys shouldn’t be looking at this! It’s legally privileged!

…You come into my house and this is how you speak to me? What did I do to deserve this disrespect?