Tuesday, May 30, 2023

From The Spamfiles

Happy Spam Day! I love months with five Tuesdays in them.

Message from Hot Butt (I’m not kidding) saying I really want you to fuck me tonight, enter to meet me
I can one hundred percent guarantee that I don’t want to meet anyone with the email address “Hot Butt”.

Message from Planet 7, saying please verify your informations, payout verification
Protip: don’t give out your informations to anyone who spells it informations.
 Message from Checkbright at Basicknit, saying lose 52 pounds in 28 days
Okay, if I’m down fifty two pounds in twenty eight days, I’ve lost a limb—possibly two.

Message from noor, ellipsis, followed by random letters and numbers, saying reward inside, confirm receipt, no tricks
They say no tricks so obviously they’re telling the truth.
New Tumblr follower 999 Antiques, which has in the bio “We buy, we pawn, we do consignments, collateral loans
Most of the spambots following me on Tumblr are just pictures of half-naked women with empty blogs, so this one that is trying to get me to sell/pawn stuff is pretty unique. Not to mention way off for Tumblr’s userbase.

Saturday, May 27, 2023

Delicate Voice

This cat sounds like a siren going off.
Panel 1, I’m on the phone with my mom, and she says, “I think my Trixie is going deaf!” Panel 2, my mom at home with her cat, Trixie, sitting behind her, and from the phone I say, “What makes you think that?” Panel 3, Trixie lets out a deafening “MEOWWWWWW!!!!!!” that makes my mom jump, Panel 4, back to me, and my mom says, “Just a hunch.”

Thankfully I didn’t have to worry about this with my cat Veronica when she went deaf, as despite being a giant, fifteen pound ball of fur, Veronica could only ever muster a light trill when she meowed.

Thursday, May 25, 2023

Language Of Confusion: Going In Circles, Part II

This week, we’re back to looking at words related to the Proto Indo European sker-, except this version of sker- means to turn or bend instead of to cut like the other one. It just goes to show that there have been homophones for as long as there has been language.
Now this word gave us circle, and you might be surprised to find out that it also gave us ring. Ring comes from the Old English hring, which means ring and also used to mean circle before it was replaced in that regard. I mean, kind of. You see a circle you can just as easily call it a ring. It’s from the Proto Germanic hringaz, which is from sker-, as weird as it might seem. Germanic did what’s called “nasalizing”, which basically means a consonant sound spoken with the soft palate, like M or N. I really don’t know how that works, because it sounds crazy to just start saying a word in a completely different way.
Also from the same place is rink. It showed up in the late fourteenth century, meaning ground sectioned off for combat or a race, and then in 1787 a section of ice for curling, and then smooth wood for skating in 1875. It’s thought to be Scottish in origin and taken from the Old French renc/reng, and that’s thought to be from hringaz as well.
It’s kind of funny that shrink is also related, yet surprisingly not as much to rink. Shrink comes from the Middle English shrinken and Old English scrincan, which also meant to shrink. It’s from the Proto Germanic skrink-, which actually makes more sense as being from sker-, although it doesn’t make much sense that to turn/bend changed into to make smaller. Still, I suppose I can kind of see it.
Then there’s ridge—ridge! It comes from the Middle English rigge and Old English hrycg, which meant ridge or a spine, and is actually what gave us rucksack. Yes, rucksack. The ruck literally meant back, and the sack is just sack, so it’s a backpack (or back sack!). Anyway, it’s from the Proto Germanic hruggin, which is thought to be from the Proto Indo European kreuk-, a form of sker-. However, this one is a lot more of a guess than the others, so it would make sense if this isn’t true. But it’s not like etymology is about making sense.
Online Etymology Dictionary
University of Texas at Austin Linguistic Research Center
University of Texas at San Antonio’s page on Proto Indo European language
University of Texas at Arlington
Tony Jebson’s page on the Origins of Old English
Old English-English Dictionary
Encyclopaedia Britannica

Tuesday, May 23, 2023

From The Spamfiles

Let’s see what the Spam Fairy has brought for us this week.

Message from Mrs. Esther Debora saying I need you in this (question mark), hello my dearest, with honor and respect to you and your family.
Obviously a cancer widow, and one who doesn’t know how to use question marks.

Message from Atten saying attention beneficiary, apparently from the British High Commission
Yes, I’m sure the British High Commission (whatever that is) is very interested in giving me, a non-Brit, many things.

Four messages, all from jeoneil4 (aka my email account) saying to check my account and I have been given money and I’m so lucky
Gee, I don’t remember sending these to myself, but I don’t remember not sending them to myself.

Message from Mrs. Elizabeth Edwa. Saying My Dear Beloved, Greeting, Please forgive me for stressing you with my predicaments
Yet another cancer widow, I assume. She really is stressing me with her predicaments.

Message from Mrs. Christine Lagarde of the European Central Bank saying An amount in Dollars was instructed to be transferred on your favor through ATM card, then repeats the previous statement so you know how legit it is, saying it’s from the government for victims who lost funds from con African artists, then they ask for my information, and finishing with we advice you to prohibit any other transaction you are having with an unknown source to avoid regret there after, and they urge me to comply fast with the managerial demands so I can have my legit ATM card, thanks and always be bless
Oh isn’t this just a parade of red flags. I love them advising me (oops, advicing me) to prohibit other transaction with an unknown source.

Saturday, May 20, 2023

Stupid, Cheap Piece Of Crap

If you’ll remember, right before last Christmas, I tripped on the cord (rushing to stop the cat from puking on the rug of course) and the connector bent, rendering it unusable. And now this, with no outside cause.
Panel 1, I’m at my laptop saying, “It’s so nice to be writing again! Huh, why is the power cable not plugged in?” Panel 2, close up of the power cord with the connector prong missing, offscreen I say, “Wait, where’s the connector?” Panel 3, close up of the port showing the connector is still in it, and I say, “…I see, stuck in the laptop. So now all I have is four hours of battery power.” Panel 4, me staring, frozen, Panel 5, me going completely grayscale in horrified shock, Panel 6, me collapsing on the ground.
The new one finally came in. It better last more than six months.

Thursday, May 18, 2023

Language Of Confusion: Going In Circles, Part I

Back into a multipart series! I’ve actually done the etymology of circle before, but it was long ago enough that it can be done as a refresher. Besides, there are a TON of other words related to it.
Circle itself showed up in the fourteenth century from the Old French cercle and classical Latin circulus, which just means circle. And I’m sure everyone has noticed that looks like circus, and there’s a reason for that. Circus showed up in the late fourteenth century where it meant large, open air enclosures for racing, not meaning what we’d call a circus until 1791. Circus was taken from classical Latin, as Romans used the word to refer to circular arenas where performances or contests took place. Circus is related to the Greek kirkos (also circus), which is thought to be from the Proto Indo European sker-. But not the “to cut” sker- we talked about as being the origin of carnage. Because words were stupid even back then, this sker- is completely different, and means to turn or bend.
Also related is circuit, which makes sense since a circuit is always supposed to be a closed circle. It showed up in the late fourteenth century, though back then it only referred to the circumference of something, even if it wasn’t circular in shape—no electricity back then, obviously, so they didn’t start using it in that way until 1746. It comes from the Old French circuit, from the classical Latin circuitus, circuit, circumference, or revolution, from the verb circuire/circumire, to go around. It’s why pretty much anything with the prefix circum- involves going around (i.e. circumvent, circumference). Circum literally means around in Latin, and it of course is from circus.
Now for some things not obviously related to circle… at least by the spelling. Crown showed up in the early twelfth century, so it’s pretty old. It comes from the Anglo French coroune, Old French corone, and classical Latin corona, which we also use in English. It’s from the Greek korone, crown, and that’s thought to also be from the to bend sker-. Because crowns and circles bend.
Online Etymology Dictionary
Google Translate
University of Texas at Austin Linguistic Research Center
University of Texas at San Antonio’s page on Proto Indo European language
Fordham University

Tuesday, May 16, 2023

From The Spamfiles

Happy Spam Day!

Message from The Great Reset saying “your face Hacked!” in the subject line and in the message itself, that the next 55 Americans to act will get something for free
The Great Reset is warning me my face was hacked (???) and also that the next fifty five Americans to act will get… something. This is like three different spam messages pasted together.

Message supposedly from PayPal saying either a hundred thousand dollars (with a period instead of a comma) or a hundred dollars (with an extra zero in the cents) has been deposited in my account.
So. Is it a hundred dollars with apparently factional cents or a hundred thousand dollars with a period instead of a comma? I almost wish I answered this one so I’d know because this is bothering me.

Message from Mrs. Esther D. Parr saying This is Urgent 241, hello my dearest, with respect to you and your family

Definitely a cancer widow. Though I’m curious to know what the 241 means.

Message from Sindy (ugh) saying gorgeous women, find your perfect girl, eleven more pics, and everything is in crazy fonts
No way am I ever answering a message from someone called “Sindy”.

Seven messages from various “psychics” wanting to tell me about the future
Maybe they should use their psychic ability to figure out they’re spewing nonsense.

Saturday, May 13, 2023

It’s Already Started

It feels like we just finished the last one.
Panel 1, I’m at home watching television, and I turn it on, Panel 2, the televisions says, “Today, on News at Five…” Panel 3, it continues, “Our latest coverage on Decision 2024!” Panel 4, looking tired, I say, “Come on, it’s May of 2023.”
I don’t think I can take another year and a half of this.

Thursday, May 11, 2023

Language Of Confusion: Floral

`We’re looking at flowers this week, since spring is finally starting to warm things up around here.
Rose comes from the Old English rose, which just means, you know, rose the plant. It’s from the classical Latin rosa, and I’m sure you can guess what that means. Not a lot of change here. It’s thought to be from the Greek rhodon, which means either rose or rhododendron, so that makes sense. It’s actually thought rhodon comes from the Iranian root word vrda-, which was a very old Persian word for rose (and FYI, the v was pronounced like a u). And by all accounts, the flower rose is not related at all to the past tense of rise.
Lily comes from the Old English lilie, from the classical Latin lilia, which means lilies, while the singular is lilium. That’s related to the Greek leirion, but what spawned both those words is unknown.
Tulip has an actual century attached to it, showing up sometime during the late sixteenth century. It’s from either the German or Dutch tulpe, which comes from the Turkish word tülbent, which means… cheesecloth. Or gauze, or muslin, or a wrapping like a turban. It’s from the Persian word dulband, turban, because apparently the flowers were first imported to Europe from Turkey, and people thought they resembled turbans.
Daisy showed up fairly early, in the fourteenth century, from the Old English daegesege, which is a mix of daeges, day, and eage, eye. Because the petals of a daisy open in the morning and close at night, the flower was called the “day eye”.
Daffodil showed up in the mid sixteenth century as asphodel, from the Middle English affodill. It’s from the Medieval Latin affodillus, classical Latin asphodelus, and Greek asphodelos, daffodil. Where’d the D come from? Well, in Dutch, they’re called de affodil, the asphodel, and since the Netherlands was an exporter of the flowers, English kind of copied the D and started saying d’asphodel or daffodil.
Online Etymology Dictionary
Google Translate
University of Texas at Arlington
Tony Jebson’s page on the Origins of Old English
Old English-English Dictionary
Dictionary of Medieval Latin

Tuesday, May 9, 2023

From The Spamfiles

Spam is so stupid and pointless and that’s why I love it.

Two messages, one from Psychic Dia (with periods in between each letter) and one from Deluxe Signature (with two periods between each word of the message). The psychic has #76 in the message, while the other has #851.
Yes, a twofer. It’s just amusing that both are very different in style and content, yet both have the #(random number) in them.

Three messages, from ACE Auto Loan underscore random letters, saying Any Credit Auto Loans, and the message in each one saying Welcome to the real-time HTML editor!
This spammer is attentive enough to change the random letters they have in each address and subject line, but too lazy to get rid of the HTML editor line that clearly has nothing to do with anything.

Message from George Foreman CHW telling me to check out the fall offer, and addressing me as slslmgo ylwazxd.
I’d like to know how I managed to get on a spam list under the name “slslmgo ylwazxd”. I’m afraid if I say it out loud, I’ll be warped to another dimension.

Message from CONGRAT, saying I need to check my account for my payout verification.

Three blog comments from Rajani Rehana, two saying Great Blog, and one saying Please read my post, and yes, all three are on the same blog post.
Because you asked, I’m totally going to go read your blog post, absolutely real person who commented the same generic message twice on one post.

Saturday, May 6, 2023


Subtle like a baseball bat to the head.
Panel 1, me with my mom, and she’s showing me her phone and saying, “Look at this ring I found online!” Panel 2, she says, “Isn’t it pretty?” Panel 3, she says, “Mother’s Day is coming up…” Panel 4, she says, “Hint hint.” And I, annoyed, say, “I get it.”
I suppose I should be happy she’s giving me an idea when she usually doesn’t.

Thursday, May 4, 2023

Language Of Confusion: Warning, Etymology Ahead, Part III

Final post of words descended from the Proto Indo European wer-, to cover, which gave us warning. And a lot of other words you wouldn’t think it gave.
First this week, we’re going back to words beginning with G: guarantee showed up in the late seventeenth century as a noun and over a century later as a verb. Originally, it was spelled garrant in English and used to refer to the person making the guarantee, coming from the Old French garant, from the Proto Germanic war-, warn or protect. As I told you two weeks ago, war- is the origin word for warn, and is directly from wer-. A guarantee is a promise to cover. How strangely sensible.
Then there’s garage, yes, like you put a car in. It’s a cover of sorts, so nothing too outlandish. However garage didn’t actually show up until 1902! It’s from the French garage, which I’m going to take a wild guess and means garage, from the verb garer, to park, shelter, or even to dock ships. That’s from the Old French garir, to protect or save, from the Frankish waron, which is also from the Proto Germanic war-. A garage is a place to protect cars.
Now we’re going to look at overt, which is not in fact related to over. Like, at all. Overt showed up in the early fourteenth century, but it meant open or unfastened before shifting a few decades later to mean obvious or in plain view. It’s from the Old French overt (verb form ovrir, which is actually a lot like covrir, the origin for cover), and that’s actually from the classical Latin aperire, to open. So French switched the V to a P??? Anyway, aperir is from the Proto Indo European ap-wer-yo, with the ap- coming from apo-, off or away, the origin of the prefix apo- (as in apology). We know what wer- is, so the word actually means something like “cover off”, which does make sense for overt, something is obviously going to be seen when its cover is off. The whole ap- to ov- thing is stupid, though. France.
Next in our list of words somehow not related to over is overture, of all things. It’s actually older than overt, having shown up in the mid thirteenth century meaning an opening or aperture. In other words, it meant a hole, then meaning an introduction in the mid fifteenth century, and then in the mid seventeenth century, music started using it to mean an opening movement. The word comes from the Old French overture, from the classical Latin apertura, the origin for aperture—which didn’t come to us from French, which must be why there’s no ov-. Anyway, apertura is from aperire, which we already know. In conclusion, overture is not over + ture, it’s overt + ure.
Finally, the last of the words: pert. Yes, pert. Frankly, after apertura, this shouldn’t be too much of a shock, though it would be if you didn’t know the backstory. Pert showed up in the mid thirteenth century, but it meant evident or obvious. By the early fourteenth century it started to mean attractive, and then later on in the century it meant impudent. No, I don’t see that progression. The word was apert in Middle English, which was from the Old French apert, which is from the Latin aperire. I don’t know how French managed to not switch to ov- for just this word, but it did.
That’s all for the warn words. Now I have to think up something else…
Online Etymology Dictionary
Google Translate
University of Texas at Austin Linguistic Research Center
University of Texas at San Antonio’s page on Proto Indo European language
University of Texas at Arlington
Encyclopaedia Britannica

Tuesday, May 2, 2023

May Goals

Well, as predicted, April was a pretty ugh month. I don’t even remember what I was supposed to be working on.
April Goals
1. Finish the web serial edits. Not sure I’ll be able to get there, but I should be able to get close.
I actually finished this! It’s a miracle! I thought it might take another month. I think it’s pretty good, but of course I’m horrible at judging my own work.
2. Update my etymology page. You know what a treat this always is. Stupid Google.
I did this, though as usual I was unable to get rid of the horrible space between all the words. I swear, Google is breaking Blogger bit by bit to drive us all away. It would explain why it’s suddenly not emailing me blog comments anymore.
3. Find some way to get my work out there more. Not that I have any idea how to do this…
As if I was able to figure this out. I really wish there was a list of clear, specific instructions for this sort of thing.
Okay, I guess. I’m not really looking forward to the stress May’s going to bring with it, though.
May Goals
1. Plan out the second part of the web serial.
2. Keep working on marketing—why does this have to be so hard?
3. Try to recharge in some way so the stress doesn’t cause me to spontaneously combust.
What do you want to do this May? Anything fun? If you’ve signed up for blog comments to be emailed to you, are you still getting them?