Tuesday, June 30, 2020

From The Spamfiles


Ah, how I love it when there’s a bonus Tuesday and I don’t have to do any introspection for another week.

Spam, yo.

I didn’t bother looking at the rest of this, so I’m not sure if it’s a “I need your help getting my money from my wicked stepmother!” thing or a come on. But given the lack of disturbing emojis, I’m assuming it’s the former.

See, this one is obviously a come on.

I’m assuming this one is too. I’m really kind of afraid of what “Those” are that she’s referring to.

What happens if I don’t confirm my subscription? Do I not get the spam you want to send me? Because I got to say. That’s seeming like a good thing.

They… they abbreviated “in”. WHAT KIND OF MONSTER ARE YOU???

I love how random and contradictory everything is. First, am I from “Old School”? Like, what even is that? Then at the end, they’re going “I have absolutely no idea who you are.” Not even sure what they’re trying for there. And finally the fact that the message begins with an offer to stop receiving these messages/opt out, because that’s something people have in perfectly normal emails.

8 comments:

  1. At least you can read your spam. Mine's all in Spanish. Still have no idea why.

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  2. Is it a new thing to just type the whole message in the subject line?

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  3. I always rush to read those emails from people who call themselves 'important'.

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  4. Gotta love those random capitalizations.

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  5. We get this spam call on our landline that claims this will be the last time we'll be offered this amazing deal..and yet they continue to call us three to four times a week.

    Really curious what 'Those' are and they're capitalized.

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  6. That subscription one is interesting!

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  7. If you didn't ASAP to all of those, I'm worried about you. There has to be something dreadful coming your way. How do you sleep at night?

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  8. I've been getting Agent Smith spamming about the illuminati.

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Please validate me.