Saturday, January 11, 2014

Twitter Spam

You all know I’m a connoisseur of spam (and a little off topic, why is connoisseur so freaking hard to spell??). It’s insane, badly translated, nonsensical garbage and I can’t resist it. But did you know that Twitter has its own special brand of spam-sanity that’s as rich and tasty as what you delete from your blog comments on a weekly basis? Just look at some of the gems that have followed me:

Bio: “Successful Internet Marketer.”
Reality: Has fewer followers than me. Hasn’t tweeted in a month.

Bio: “Hello I am a network marketing coach who trains others on how to build there own blogging site and market themselves as an expert in there niche.”
Reality: Their. The word is their.

Bio: “Health education,weight loss,detox,detoxing,colonhealth,acai berry colon cleanse,detoxcolon,detox weight loss,detoxify colon”.
Reality: Stay away from my colon.

Bio: “I only one week join with twitter, but we have thousands twitter followers now , need know my secret?, visit :”
Reality: At best, you’re paying thirty bucks for hundreds of spambots. At worst, you’ll end up evicted from your house and unable to get a credit card because your identity has been stolen.

Bio: “Hot tramp you love so”.
Reality: Wrong on so many levels.

Bio: “You dreamed I was a very clean tramp.”
Reality: Eep.

Bio: “Today i join to twitter, but we have thousands twitter followers now , need know my secret?,”
Reality: Clearly it isn’t proper grammar.

As with all spam, it makes me wonder how people can actually fall for it. Which they do, otherwise there wouldn’t be so much of it.


  1. Stay away from my colon - funny!
    Yeah the ones claiming they have the secret to lots of Twitter followers but less followers than I? Don't want to know what they know.
    The worst for me are those who automatically send a direct message of thanks for the follow and now go like my Facebook page. I enjoy answering them back and saying I'm not on Facebook!

  2. My mind still boggled over email spam. Who the heck believes that lottery winners have chosen to give their money away to strangers (on a daily basis) or that very polite and God-fearing people in foreign nations truly need our help to complete a financial transaction? Like you said, there wouldn't be so much of it if they weren't getting some response, right?

  3. I don't actually get very much blog spam. Almost none, in fact. Am I doing something wrong?
    However, I am planning to finally join the twitterverse, so, maybe, I should check out one of those "people" that can get me thousands of followers in a day.

    Blame the French.

  4. I find spam hilarious. I can't believe anyone falls for their lines, but people must. How gullible are some people?

  5. Connoisseur? Yeah, it's a French thing.

    Some of those bios are scary.

  6. Some of these spammers are bots. If they're not bots, then they have a lot of time on their hands.

  7. Most are automated messages. I worry about the people who fall for the scams.

  8. I get some twitter spam- including today. But mostly the spam shows up in the spam folders in my blog... and some of that can be incredibly ludicrous. Other spam shows up in email junk folders, and of course are variations on ye olde Nigerian spammer spam.


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