Just Stop

I was reading the editorials section of the newspaper again. I know, I know, this does nothing except get me angry, but I can come up with more ideas when I’m pissed off so I read it every day. Anyway, while reading yet another bigoted, close-minded article (not even a letter but an actual article printed by the newspaper), I got to thinking that there are some things that are just big red warning signs that you should stop talking. For example…

1. I’m not racist/sexist/homophobic, but…

Just stop. If you have to start a sentence with that preface, it’s a sign that you probably are racist/sexist/homophobic. I’m not saying you can’t have your opinions—go ahead, even if it’s unpopular—but frigging own them. Don’t say you can have them because you’re not anti-whatever.

2. I don’t hate this group, so they can’t be mad if I want to deny them rights/benefits/funding/whatever.

Just stop. You may consider what you’re doing noble—and hell, maybe it is, I certainly can’t judge—but to this opposing group, it is an act of hatred. Stand by your actions and beliefs, but don’t expect everyone to extoll you for them, especially the people on the opposite side of the fight.

3. Everyone needs to know why I’m right and they’re wrong.

Just stop. Maybe they’re wrong about, and you should certainly stand up for your beliefs. But there’s no need to give a speech to everyone around justifying your actions. The only person you’re making to feel better is yourself.

4. It’s not fair I get attacked because my beliefs are “unpopular”.

Just stop. No, it’s not right for someone to attack you for your beliefs, but if the belief was “popular” and you were attacked, it would be just as wrong. Having a popular opinion doesn’t mean it’s okay to get hate directed towards you either.

5. My opinions and beliefs are being criticized. That’s not fair!

Just stop. No one gets a golden ticket freeing them from criticism. If you publicly announce something, you can bet people will respond. Some will be trolls and attackers. They don’t deserve consideration because they are jerks no matter who they’re criticizing. But just as you’re allowed to express your beliefs, people are allowed to express their counter-beliefs. If they find flaws in your reasoning, you can either respond or ignore them, but it’s a jerkass move to complain that it’s unfair.

Top Ten Reasons Why…

…People Have Got to Stop Bitching About Newspaper Comics.

10. Just because you think a comic is “sick sick sick” (actual quote from a letter to the editor), doesn’t mean it is. It means youdon’t like it.

9. We all know that the only way to get in the funny pages is to have gotten in there fifty years ago. It’s not going to change.

8. There’s this thing called “the internet” that has more comics than you could read in your lifetime. And most are free. Why don’t you go support one of those struggling cartoonists instead of someone with a fifty year contract in place?

7. Even with the hundreds of comics out there, there is not one single assortment of them that will satisfy more than one person.

6. You’re not going to enjoy something now like you did when you were five. It’s not that the quality has declined. It’s always been like that. But you still have that memory of laughing at Garfield or Popeye or whatever so you insist that it must have gotten worse. You couldn’t have changed or something.

5. Maybe it’s only the newspaper I read, but the comics very rarely change. Unless they’re doing an announced test run of a strip, it’s going to be there for a while. More than half have been there since I can remember, so over twenty years and only six, maybe eight have been dropped, and at least three of those were from the strips ending. So complain all you want. They aren’t going to listen.

4. If you read the Comics Curmudgeon regularly, you’ll start to see sinister undertones in everything, not just the comics you despise. So maybe it’s not the funnies that’s the problem. Hint.

3. You can just not read them. Is it really that hard? I ignore plenty of comics that bore me. You know what I do instead? Complain about them on my blog Read something else.

2. They’re freaking comics. Get over it.

1. Seriously. One more word and I’m coming after you.

Post inspired by recent letters to the editor. Because if I read another one whining about how every newfangled comic is pure evil and OMG they’re letting children read this filth? my scream will shatter the planet. Seriously, comics need to go up there with politics and religion as topics people can never discuss in a civil manner.