Tuesday, February 14, 2023

From The Spamfiles

Happy Spamintines Day!

Shut up. It might be a thing.

Message from Fidelity Life, saying “welcome to your life insurance” without any spaces in between the letters.
Life insurance spam has always intrigued me. It’s not much different from the casino spam, really. It wants money from you, promises a payout, and will absolutely not deliver should the time come.

Message from Mrs. Martha Elena, VERY VERY URGENT, saying please forgive me for stressing you, a perfectly normally worded sentence.
I didn’t actually look at the message, but it’s safe to assume it’s a cancer widow. And it’s VERY VERY URGENT!!!

Message from Serenity, saying a sleep brain scan reveals the real root cause of tinnitus.
And the real root cause is hearing loss, obviously. Now make it go away! I’m sick of the constant beeping in my ears!

This one’s from “conf” followed by ellipses, an at symbol, more ellipses, then some not-words, saying my status pending, confirmation needed.
It’s kind of insulting when they don’t bother to make it look like a real email address. They’re not even trying!

Another Tumblr follower, this one with a picture of a pregnant woman in a bikini, standing next to another woman.
This is… one of the weirder spambot followers I’ve had lately. Is that seriously a pregnant woman????? This raises all kinds of questions as to why, and I don’t want to know any of the answers.

5 comments:

  1. Makes you wonder who's actually in the photo and do they know a spammer stole their image?

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  2. I will celebrate Spamintines Day way before any other sort of -tines Day. (I may be just a touch cranky today...)

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  3. Hey, at least you got something for Spamintine's Day and it lived up to its name. That's a win in my book.

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  4. I'll just put it out there: if cancer widows really were dying of cancer, I would say, "good."

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  5. Awwww...Spamintine's Day. I love it so much more than Valentine's Day. (Liz is not the only maybe cranky person today/yesterday).

    I think it's a real mark of their target audience when the spammers don't even have to try to make it look like a real email.

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Please validate me.