Headache of the Day

So I came across this. Anyone else as ticked off about it as I am?

A seven year old boy points his finger like a gun and is suspended (well, given in-school suspension) because of it. The school said they told him to stop repeatedly but he would not. And you know it's totally unlike a seven year old to do the exact opposite of what they are told. I know I never went against what my teachers or parents told me to do. Also, I have a nice beach property in Florida to sell to you at a steal, I'm practically giving it away. Cash up front. You send it to me and I'll hand over the deed.

When I was that age, if someone got in trouble for not listening or acting up (which is the only think I can say he did), they were scolded, given little frowny faces on this chart or--for the most heinous of crimes--held in for recess. But I doubt any of the other children felt threatened or harassed by the boy's finger, so I really don't think it is an appropriate response. There just doesn't seem to be a reason for the punishment other than he's doing something they don't like! It's not a rude gesture and like I said, it's not really threatening. Not to mention he was probably doing it because he got such a reaction from the school.

I'm all for keeping the schools safe and suspending people for threatening others, but they can't just hold every word under a blanket policy. When I was in eighth grade, I threatened another student in a note. Yes, it was very stupid. But I wanted him to stop saying bad things about my friend. He threatened to tell on me, which would have gotten me suspended for words written in anger if my friend hadn't stolen the note from him. It was a stupid mistake, one of many kids can make. And I would have gotten a huge black mark on my record for it, even though I was never a trouble-making student and the school knew it. A detention, that I could live with. But that's not what would have happened and it scares me to think what might have happened if my friend hadn't saved my ass.

I think the zero tolerance policy is lazy. It morphs every situation into one crime without taking into account the millions of different factors that inform it. Years ago, I saw a story where a twelve year old was suspended because someone else gave him a Ritalin tablet on the bus. The kid promptly through it out the window but the driver saw him with it and he was kicked out of school. I think they even brought charges against him! And all this because the rules said handling any drug required automatic suspension. Preposterous.

It's time to start focusing on actual problems in school and remembering that there is no uniform policy for every situation. Kids do stupid things. Is it really that hard to distinguish threats from bad behavior? I don't have children, nor do I teach, so I don't know. But as a former student, all I can say is what I experienced at the other end of zero tolerance. It didn't stop kids from bullying me and others and it didn't teach me any lesson besides "if you ever screw up, you'll be in big trouble."

Zero tolerance is intolerance. Let the kid play his game and find a real problem to worry about. I'm sure they're there.

Intolerance

"Just because you have to tolerate something doesn't mean you have to approve of it. If you had to like it, it'd be called...acceptance. Tolerate means you're just putting up with it. You tolerate a crying child sitting next to you on an airplane or you tolerate a bad cold. But it can still piss you off!"

Yes, it’s from South Park. The gay teacher, Mr. Garrison, was trying to get fired by acting outrageously inappropriate in class, but when the kids complained, they were sent to “The Deathcamp of Intolerance.” Fed up with everyone accepting him, Garrison blows up at the town, reminding them that acceptance and tolerance are different things. You can tolerate something and it can still piss you off. It's something I wish people were more willing to do.

It can be annoying, because tolerance means something you completely don’t agree with can go on in front of your face. Of course, there is a time when you have to stop tolerating and act, but even that should be within the bounds of proper society. Go ahead and hate illegal immigrants. If you suspect someone is here illegally, it’s perfectly right to call the police or immigration. But you don’t harass them, or ever hurt them. Because they are people, people who deserve life and freedom. Breaking the law does not make it open season for inappropriate behavior. Nor does something going against your own moral code--I'm looking at you, jerks who were protesting at a soldier's funeral.

A few years ago, I was coming out of the student union on my college campus waiting for a shuttle down to the parking lot. I noticed a crowd gathered on the quad and when I caught sight of a banner with “burn in hell” on it, I had to go over. Some jerkoff was walking around with a banner saying atheists, Catholics, unsubmissive women (direct quote on that one), homosexuals, abortionists, et al. It infuriated me.

“What about ‘judge not lest ye be judged?’” I yelled. What did this man do? He said “Yeah, maybe you should stop judging me.”

He, in fact, said he was “perfect” and “a saint.” And then ten seconds later, claimed he never said that. Then a minute later, he was claiming it again. Apparently, the bible didn’t apply to him, only people who didn’t believe in what he did. Oh, and when I pointed out that the first pope was Jesus’ disciple Peter, he called me a liar and a whore. The man was a complete ass and I regret not using that thing I can do when I figure out someone’s weakness and use it against them. 

The thing that still bothers me about that man is why. Why did he hate so much? Why does anyone? There are a lot of things I don’t like in the world, but that doesn’t mean I get to be mean to people who do like them. I wasn’t a fan of President Bush but when I saw someone put a Hitler-stache on his face, I was horrified. That just wasn’t right. You don’t disrespect someone just because you don’t like them. If someone did that to me, I would cry—the man is one of history’s greatest monsters. Being equated to him…is sickening.

At least, I don’t. And most of the people I’m friends with don’t (or they aren’t friends anymore). Yes, standing up for what you believe in is right. No, being obnoxious, hurtful and intolerant isn’t, even if the other person is wrong or ignorant. Because, tell me: does anyone like being yelled at, insulted or hurt for their values/beliefs? No. And it doesn’t help anything to be so.