---You might think writing a post like this is easy, but thinking up words to fill these spaces is very difficult. Like I’m doing right now.
---I love the first few days of spring, when it’s warm and fun to enjoy. Before I have to spend the next four months battling wave after wave of the ant invasion.
---There are ants out there that cultivate a fungus (farming…a scary enough prospect for beings with a brain smaller than a pin) that they use as a glue to build a tiny tower that’s full of holes (architecture…even more frightening). What’s the tower for? To catch bigger bugs. They work together, each hole filled with an ant grabbing onto the larger insect while other ants go and sting it to death. Sleep well.
---They’re coming for you.
---Does anyone under 18 ever not click something that says “Only click if you are 18 years old or older”? EVER?
---When I hear middle aged people complain about how “rude” younger people are, I know it’s the same ones who bitch at the barista for giving them the wrong flavor of coffee when it is, in fact, what they ordered. Shocking. People tend to be rude to rude people.
---Best moment ever: while working in a deli, a woman chewed me out because her heated tuna fish sandwich was cooled (amazingly enough, things can get cool very quickly). Then she yelled at me for adding peppers to the sandwich. I insisted that I did not. She pointed to a green blob and yelled “There! What’s that?” To which I calmly replied: “Celery.”
---My reasons for preferring online newspapers to actual ones can be summed up by what I think of the comics page: the local newspaper rarely debuts comics that haven’t been running for the past fifty years, so I was surprised when they got rid of the boring and ridiculous Rex Morgan MD and replaced it with the actually entertaining Gil by Norm Feuti. It’s almost unthinkable. A comic strip I actually enjoy! And of course people are writing to the newspaper to complain about it for the audacity of having actual characters in a realistic modern setting. Heaven forbid there be some innovation in the newspaper comics.
---Newspapers are great to use to clean windows. So that’s one thing they have over the internet.
---Whenever I hear “I deeply regret” used in a sentence, I know it’s got to be from a politician.
---Finally, I thought this was hilariously apt:
Fortunately, I'm an insomniac so I wasn't going to be sleeping well before I read that ant thing. But if I wasn't already, I would be now. Creepy.
ReplyDeleteMy favorite comic is Mark Trail. It's so bad, it's hysterical. My local paper doesn't carry it though so my mother cuts them out of her paper and sends them to me.
The rude thing--so true. I keep hearing from people how rude younger people are, and yet frequently at school, students will open the door for me and let me go in first. All the time. And I get please and thank you, too. From students. In class.
ReplyDeleteI think it's more about what you put out there. I try to be polite as much as I can, and most people are polite to me in return. Even teenagers.
This post explains why I like your blog!
ReplyDeleteLove the random thoughts. haha I wonder just how many under 18 people do tell the truth on that one...
ReplyDeleteI go online for the comic strips the papers don't carry... gocomics is a good source.
ReplyDeleteAnd of course the under 18 crowd will click on the material in question anyway...