Scary Movies 2017

More Halloween spooktacular fun! This week: movies.

Hell House LLC

This is pretty standard found footage fare, but it does manage to bring with it some genuinely creepy moments. A group of people are documenting their creation of a Halloween house, which happens to take place in a notorious hotel. Creepy stuff starts happening, obviously. There’s nothing new here, but I liked it and would suggest giving it a try if you’re having a scary movie night.

The Void

This movie is pretty bad in terms of story, characters, acting, and pretty much everything else. Its one shining asset is the amazing special effects used to create the monsters. I would recommend this only because it’s watchable enough to endure so you can enjoy some really cool monsters. If you like eighties horror movies, this will be right up your alley.

Mr. Jones

Okay, if I’m being honest, I put this movie on the list because I have no idea what the hell it was about and I’m hoping that if someone else watches it, they’ll be able to figure it out. If it had more focus, it might have actually been good. The basic plot is that a couple discovers that a man living out in the woods is a mysterious artist who sends creepy figures to random people, something which is never really explained. Which…yeah, “never really explained” sums up most of the movie. You get some hints and some speculation, but not nearly enough. I’m not someone who needs every little thing explained in great detail, but something would have been nice. So skip it unless you want to see some creepy imagery.

Dark Skies

Probably the movie here that I most enjoyed. It’s a typical alien abduction story, this time involving a whole family, and it has some of the usual horror movie tropes, i.e. the dad refusing to accept that it’s true after everyone else has. But it’s still enjoyable and genuinely creepy at times, and everything about it felt well done. Definitely try it out.

I Am The Pretty Thing That Lives In The House

This Netflix original is about the caregiver of an elderly writer, but it’s also about the writer’s most famous novel, about a ghost that might very well live in the house. It’s, well, atmospheric. I guess that’s the best thing I can say about it. I liked it, but it’s probably not something I’d watch again, and I have to say I doubt a lot of people would enjoy it. If you want a gothic ghost story in the modern era, this is definitely it.

More Movie Reviews

What can I say? I like to watch movies. Mostly scary this time, because of course last month was October.

The Babadook

TL;DR: Woman finds a weird story book and reads it to her young son. Weird things start happening, adding to the stress of raising her hyperactive son. And then it gets worse.

I’m definitely ambivalent on this one. The horror is pretty good and I thought the characterization of Amelia, the overwhelmed single mom, was great, but yeah, it definitely has problems. I actually liked the ending, but I can see why other people don’t; in some ways, it’s a non-ending and you’re left with the feeling of not being sure what the hell happened, and not in a good way. Give it a watch if you’re in the mood for a very creepy first half, but you might end up being disappointed in the rest. Unless you’re really into symbolism.

The Mirror

TL;DR: Three roommates obtain a supposedly haunted mirror in order to prove that the supernatural exists. Things…don’t go well.

This movie was okay, though personally, I think Oculus did the whole haunted mirror thing better. I didn’t mind it, but it really didn’t leave much of an impression on me, like to the point that I don’t really have much to say about it. Still, it’s perfectly watchable and you might even like it.

Torment

TL;DR: Family goes out for a vacation at their country and when they wake up in the middle of the night to find their son is gone, they realize that someone is out there hunting them.

I would give this a solid seventy percent. It didn’t take any chances or do anything new, but it still managed to have a fairly interesting story. Probably the worst fault is that the end feels a little obvious. I also felt like there wasn’t enough explanation as to the motivations of the villains.

Creep

TL;DR: Videographer Aaron takes a job filming a dying man named Josef, who seems a little off. Then he seems really off.

I definitely liked this one, but I found myself constantly asking why Aaron was going along with what Josef wanted, especially as time went on and it became obvious that Josef wasn’t who he claimed to be. This is also a found footage movie, which is totally overdone but actually works here to enhance the creepiness. So if you can ignore Aaron’s questionable choices, then yes, watch it.

Time Lapse

TL;DR: Three roommates, Finn, Callie, and Jasper, discover that their dead neighbor has a camera that takes a picture of their apartment…one day in the future.

I have to say, I was pleasantly surprised by this movie. At first, I was so annoyed with the tropes that were appearing, especially involving Callie, only for those tropes to be turned completely on their heads. This was a brilliant picture and I definitely recommend checking out this twist on a time travel story. The ending was one of the best I’ve seen in a long time.

Halloween 2013

Only five days until Halloween! Yay! Can you tell I’ve been excited about it? So in keeping with this month’s tradition of sharing scary things on Saturday, here’s the most frightening things I’ve come across this year:

Scariest Video Game

The Last Door, chapters 1 and 2, a gothic horror game about a man trying to determine what happened to his boarding school friends. Has the bonus of also being a great story in its own right.

Scariest Horror Short

Proxy. Remember a couple of weeks ago when I told you about the Slender Man shows on YouTube? This is another one, but it’s just a short and only about ten minutes long. Totally creep-tastic.

Scariest Horror Short Story

Candle Cove, by Kris Straub. It’s about a bunch of people reminiscing about a bizarre show they used to watch. Trust me, it’s a good one.

Well, share: what are the scariest movies and stories you’ve come across?

The Meaning of Fear

I enjoy scary movies and such, but as I’ve mentioned before, I’m not often scared by them. I mean, it’s not like they’re spiders or public speaking. I’m not in real danger, so there isn’t much fear. So when I find something that actually gives me chills, I take note.

Recently, I’ve become quite the fan of the Slender Man Mythos. The Slender Man is basically an eldritch abomination that appears as a tall, faceless man in a business suit. It’s…less ridiculous than it sounds. Those who cross paths with it usually end up in pieces. Or worse.

The two most popular methods of telling Slender stories are via blogs or vlogs (although there has also been a few video games and even movies). There are some good blogs out there, but the vlogs are really where the terror of the Slender Man shines, so I’m going to share with you lucky people the ones that I’m currently following.

Tribe Twelve

In A Nutshell: While reviewing footage of his deceased cousin’s last visit, Noah discovers something stalking Milo. And now it’s set its sights on Noah.

In terms of scariness, this one varies from mild to moderate. It’s more mystery oriented, and unlike some mysteries, there are actually answers. It’s just that they end up being worse than not knowing anything.

Everyman Hybrid

In A Nutshell: Four friends decide to post exercise and health videos with a funny background gag of being stalked by a certain tall being. Then their houses get broken into, they find garbage bags filled with body parts, and everyone around them starts dying.

Moderate to very scary. It’s honestly a lot milder at first, but things keep getting worse for the main characters. There’s a lot of mystery, but also a lot of gore, especially later on. If you watch about six videos in, when they’re still trying to do their exercise videos, you’ll see some surprisingly gruesome things. And that’s nothing compared to what’s in store. Seriously, you just have to be amazed at what these guys can do with a shoestring budget.

Dark Harvest

In A Nutshell: Alex wants to record the strange noises in his house. That somehow snowballs into him and his friend Nick trying to hide from a cult that worships a very nasty being.

For the most part, it’s only mildly scary, but it’s also got a lot going on to keep viewers interested. It’s not as action-y (or gruesome) as Everyman Hybrid, nor is it as what-the-hell-is-going-on?! as Tribe Twelve. Dark Harvest manages to meet somewhere in the middle and give the best of both worlds.

Marble Hornets

In A Nutshell: Jay is reviewing some footage he got from his old friend Alex. And he’s finding some pretty disturbing things. It only gets worse when he insists upon investigating.

I would call it the scariest one, with episodes ranging from “frightening” to “heart attack”. I think the first video is a good example of what’s to come: it’s disorienting, terrifying, and inescapable. All in something like thirty seconds.

Scarefest

I have a confession to make: while I enjoy scary movies and books, for the most part, I’m not scared by them. Okay, it’s kind of a strange confession, but it’s true. I might jump if I’m in a theater (because anything is scary in a movie theater), but that’s it. There isn’t much terror in it. If it’s not the first time I’ve watched it, forget about it. The same goes for books, too. Maybe this is because I’ve read Stephen King ever since I was eight, but I don’t ever remember being sleep-with-the-light’s-on-or-the-monster-will-get-me scared.

Am I weird? Eh, whatever. It doesn’t stop me from enjoying it. Unless it’s a bad movie. Because those just ruin everything. But if you’re looking for something scary, you might want to try the books and movies that actually scared me:

The Orphanage

Fright Rating: 2 (Out of 5)

This was a Spanish movie that received a limited release in the US. I had to travel across the state to see it (not as far as it sounds, trust me) but it was worth it. While it wasn’t super scary, it gave me chills. It was an emotionally driven movie about a family who bought a house that twenty years ago, was the orphanage the mother lived in. Ghostly things start happening and the end was quite a punch to the gut. If you don’t mind reading subtitles, try to pick up a copy.

IT

Fright Rating: 2

Stephen King’s tale of the monster that wakens every twenty-seven years or so to stalk children of a town in Maine. Parts of this book still give me tingles and I’ve probably read it a dozen times. I think the scariest part is Mike Hanlon’s reflections about the nature of the word haunt (is anyone surprised that word play drew my attention?) and what it means to the town of Derry.

The Exorcist

Fright Rating: 3

I’m so glad I was able to see the rerelease in the theater. It really creeped me out, even though it wasn’t the first time I saw the movie. The basic plot is about a girl, daughter to a movie star, who is seemingly possessed. The book delves deeper into the “is she faking it?” question and is at least as scary as the movie, perhaps more so because there’s more time for the tension to build and more tension always encourages horror.

Paranormal Activity

Fright Rating: 3

Found footage movies are kind of this generation’s slasher movies. Some people hate them, but most of them scare me (unlike slasher movies, which I find to be yawn-fests). I thought Paranormal Activity was well done because a lot of the fear hinges on how real it seems. And it’s not gory or full of monsters. It’s just two people trying to make sense of evidence that neither is prepared to deal with.

The Statement of Randolph Carter

Fright Rating: 3.5

Actually, this goes for pretty much everything of Lovecraft’s that I’ve read, including Herbert West—Reanimator, The Call of Cthulhu, and the Whisperer in Darkness. All scared me a pretty decent amount. I think that is due to Lovecraft’s skill at building tension and describing people who are so frightened, that they would rather jump out of a window rather than face the demon (in all fairness, it’s a pretty bad demon).

House of Leaves

Fright Factor: 3.5

This is a great example of realistic horror. No monsters (okay, that’s arguable), just a situation that is so inexplicable that it’s frightening. It’s also very character driven, which I love. Most of the fear comes from this family who returns from a short vacation to find their house has gained new hallways, one of which should lead out into the back yard but instead goes into a cold black corridor.

So these are my recommendations for the Halloween season. Enjoy the scarefest! And all hail great Cthulhu!