On Civility

Lately, there’s been a lot of talk about bullying in schools, something I experienced, well, a lot. From fourth to eighth grades I was a verbal punching bag for about ten percent of the students and even a few teachers, while the other ninety percent did pretty much nothing no matter how many times I went to the guidance counselors and principals. Seriously, it was to the point that the one time someone stood up for me I was stunned into silence because holy crap, someone with confidence was telling a jerk to shut up and he listened.

But it some ways, I got off easy. Back then (waaaaay long ago, in the nineties) the internet was only partially integrated into our lives. No Facebook, no Myspace, no pages made to make fun of me. And for that I am insanely grateful. I mean, online anonymity is possibly the worst invention for the oversensitive. Have you ever read the comments at the bottom of a news story? That. All the bullies have been given the freedom to behave their worst on a wide scale. How’s that for a Halloween scary story?

So it follows that school bullies plus internet equals bad news. There’s no escape at home anymore, no respite from the pain. Twenty-four seven the immature dillholes who have it out for you can shit on your reputation and remind you that you’re worthless.

I know none of you reading my blog act like this, but I had to get it off my chest. I just wish everyone would be nicer. Not just kids. Everyone. Who do you think they learn from? Adults, who I’ve seen yell at servers for making a sandwich wrong and make fun of those who screw up while playing a baseball game. Bullying behavior should never be tolerated, online or in life. Derisive comments should be deleted—not criticisms but actual harassing, degrading, debasing words. People insulting or bullying others should be told in no uncertain terms to shut up.

Freedom of speech doesn’t mean freedom from consequences.

Okay, I’ll shut up now. What are your thoughts about online bullying? What do you think should be done about it?

Become part of the be nice online movement

Being nice.

I think it’s something we could all use a lot of. I was talking to the incomparable Gavriella Zahtz about the hatred spewing forth online. It happens on almost every subject. Pick one and you’ll find someone who hates it and is determined to insult everyone who disagrees.

I don’t get it. I know it’s online and (virtually) anonymous, but why are people so rude? Why am I called “part of the pet-obsessed problem” when I sign animal rights petitions? Why am I called a nazi because I support a single payer health care system? Disagree with me. Explain reasons why I am wrong. But don’t call me names and don’t expect me to change.

Social media is a powerful tool. It connects people who otherwise wouldn’t meet and it can unite people in different countries. So why do people use it as a place to bully people, humiliate them, or post their address when they don’t like the singer you do?

Just because you can do something doesn’t mean you should. The world would be a better place if people let go of the anger and remembered other people's points of view are just as valid as theirs. Jesus forgave the people who crucified him. I think I can let be nice to people who disagree with me. Even if they are rude.

And you?